Instructions

Set Up: Prepare for the Activity

Organize participants into small groups (4-6 ppl).

Begin by introducing the learning goals of this activity.

Step One: Create Patience Principles (10 min)

As a full group, invite participants to generate a list of statements that are designed to encourage patience and generous interpretation in a discussion.

Share some of the following examples to spark ideas.

• Language is imperfect and we are all imperfect speakers.

• What is said and what is heard are not always aligned.

• None of us are perfect listeners.

• Focus on the idea, not the person.

• Being inarticulate means to struggle with big ideas.

• Innovative ideas are often misunderstood at first.

• Look for the “nuggets of truth” in all statements.

• Never aim to embarrass or humiliate.

Step Two: Identify Common Annoyances in Discussions (5 min)

In small groups, ask participants to quickly identify 5 - 10 common discussion annoyances that tend to incite a harsh or impatient reaction from them. For example,

• When someone shares inaccurate information with a lot of confidence

• When someone says something that is culturally insensitive

• When someone speaks from a place of anger

• Instruct each group to select their top three annoyances.

Step Three: Craft Mental Tricks for Generous Interpretation (20 min)

Invite participants to craft three specific mental tricks they can use in a discussion to help them practice patience and even generous interpretation in response to each of the annoyances their group identified. Prompt:

For example, when someone makes a statement that you think is completely wrong or even bizarre, what sort of mental trick can you employ that would force you to pause and practice generosity?

• Maybe you could try to reimagine the person who made this comment as your most respected professor or colleague.

• If this person made the comment, how would you respond? Maybe you would still be confused and even disagree, but how would you express yourself to this person?

• Would you ask clarifying questions? Would you speak respectfully? Would you put yourself through mental gymnastics to try to understand their perspective?

• The “mental trick” is to now extend these generous responses to a person who you do not know.

Step Four: Debrief as a Full Group (10 min)

• Let’s start with annoyances! What are our top and favorite discussion annoyances?

• What are some of the strategies or mental tricks that you created to address these annoyances?

• What are some common themes or strategies in our mental tricks?

• When is this approach a bad idea? When should we not seek out the most generous interpretation of what someone is saying?